Thirty things I’ve learned in 30 years:
With just a couple of hours left as my desk calendar draws the curtains on my 30th year, I reflect back on the last 3 decades of my life. When I look back, I don’t just see years passing by but an evolution of a notorious kid into a stubborn teen to a mature person turning into an Independent woman and now a loving wife in my thirties. (I love to take credit and praise myself, lol)
These 30 years were not just years of existence but along came experiences and profound life lessons, some easy and some bitter. So, if you are Turning 30 soon or simply reading along, here is a list of Thirty things I learned over 30 years and few pearls of wisdom I wish I could share with my younger self.
Thirty things I learned in 30 years:
- Self-Love is not Selfish: If you love yourself a little too much then its not being selfish. If you cant love yourself first, how can you ever love someone else whole heartedly? For me, Main apni favorite hu is taken a bit too seriously.
- F**k the Log Kya Kahenge mentality: Its 2019. Can we stop this already what society will say, what aunty ke husband ke pautte ke dada ke bhai kya kahenge? I mean, How does the opinions of others matter? You do You! Tell those Log to piss off!
- Love thy Flaws: Believe me, it took me really long to love my flawed body, to embrace my bruises and marks. There was no #bodypositive #Selflove #mentalhealth when I met with an accident and there was no #Instagram or social media either. With time I accepted myself and I am glad I did. And refer to point 25.
- What you seek is seeking you: What you have been looking for is watching out for you too. Life comes full circle sooner or later. So, keep seeking what you desire.
- It’s never too late to do things you believe in: I started with many things much later in my life like taking care of myself, putting myself first and even chasing my passion and making a career out of it. If you love something, go for it. Age is just a number.
- You are never too old to travel Solo: I, mostly, face a flurry of questions with regards to my experiences of travelling Solo. I was recently asked by a lady in her fifties if its safe for her to travel by herself at this age. And I replied affirmatively. What next? She messaged me soon after she completed her first solo trip and it made me immensely happy knowing my words could spark a fire and inspire someone to take their first steps.
- ‘ASK’ before you Expect or Assume: There’s nothing wrong in asking someone if you need help. But its wrong to expect them to help you without sharing your problems. No, Telepathy doesn’t work, duhh. Tell them, express and for a change don’t assume. It feels better to Ask than to Expect from a muted conversation.
- Real friends are few: You don’t need a large BFF squad to call your own. Just a few genuine ones can go a long way. I have few friends that I can count on. And I am glad they are still with me.
- Your past, position, likes, followers, earnings, degree, grades do not define you: Its how you perceive yourself that defines you. Your karma and deeds define you. Don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.
- Don’t hold grudges, forgive your enemies but don’t forget their names though.
- Life is too short. tell your family how much you love them. Eat that guilt murdering chocolate cake, take that solo trip, try that Bungee Jump, Fall in Love. Do not procrastinate. We feel we have plenty of time, but we don’t.
- Three words that make me the happiest: Naah, not the “I Love you”. Its “Here’s your Coffee”. Btw “where’s my coffee Cy’
- Celebrate every little victory: I made my first latte art, learned how to cook Dal, baby sit my niece without pulling my hair. Every little victory is worth celebrating. Unless you don’t celebrate your victories & achivements, others may not.
- You may not always have the support of your loved ones when starting something new. Don’t give up. Continue working towards your goal.
- Karma is a B***h : What you deserve, the universe will serve. What you put out into the world will come back to you. Kar bhala toh ho bhala.
- Do not Compare yourself with others: Everybody’s path is different, graph is different. What worked for me might not work you and vice versa. Do not measure your success on someone else’s graph. You are you and that’s what makes you special.
- Not everything you see on Social media is True: It’s a double-edged sword. Social Media is a beautiful platform to Inspire and get inspired but feelings of insecurity and inferiority can be harmful. Use it wisely.
- Do things what you have been afraid to do: I am afraid of heights and guess who conquered it with jumping from 83 meters high, yes, that’s your girl. I attempted bungee jumping from India’s highest point in Rishikesh and got a certificate to prove it.
- Pause and Restart: Sometimes slowing down and just being in the moment can solve many puzzles. Pause, kick start and watch yourself overcome steep hurdles.
- Take yourself out on a date: Even after being married to the love of my life, I still go on a self-date. I like to treat myself and love spending time alone. Whether its watching a movie or shopping or simply enjoying a cuppa in my own company, I love solitary therapy.
- Be Grateful: Even though I have struggled for a larger part of my life, I am still grateful for everything I have, for where I stand. I am grateful for the delicious meals, the comforting roof over my head, my supportive family and all the crazy but lovely people I met along the way.
- Life is a journey not an Amazing Race: You don’t have to be better than others. Refer point 16.
- Your family will always stand by you. Referring to a short caption on social media: Millions of followers on social media, thousands of friends on facebook, more than a hundred contacts in his phone book, yet in his final moments only with his wife and kids are at his bedside. This touched my heart. Don’t take your family for granted, they are precious.
- Dust away the negativity: Set people free, the ones that keep you surrounded by hate and negativity. Walk on and let the good times roll in. Peace !!
- Perfection, is it real? There is no such thing as the perfect life, perfect partner, perfect job, perfect body or the perfect xyz. Stop looking out for perfection, there will always be room for improvement. Just be the better version of yourself.
- Nothing lasts forever: This is not just the title of my favorite book from Sidney Sheldon but a bitter reality. Some relationships will not survive the test of time. Their part in your story is over, move on to the next chapter hon.
27. Not everyone is going to like you: You cant please everyone coz you are not Pizza. In the words of the legendary “Jobs”, If you want to please everyone, become an ice cream seller.
- Follow your dreams, Chase your Passion: Hum ek baar jeete hai, ek baar marte, fir kyu apne sapne ko maarna. Kya pata Kal Ho Na Ho. Huh, Kuch zyada filmy hogaya. Dream on and keep believing.
29. Numbers doesn’t matter, not even in Age: I am turning 31 and I don’t shy away from that. I am still learning something new everyday. It’s never too late to learn something new or to change your life to improve.
- Its okay to say NO: Want to sleep in on a Saturday night, flake out at the last minute, want to refuse an offer that won’t go well with your ethics. Its okay to say NO! Nothing makes me happier than being able to take life decisions without hurting my conscience.
I definitely learned more than thirty things here is a final few words for all of you ” Promise me you‘ll always remember: You‘re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” — Christopher Robin to Winnie the Pooh
Thank you for staying & come along as I walk into the next chapter of my life. I am ready for you 30+1 😊
P.s: Thirty aint Dirty!
Until then,
Also read thirty things you don’t know about me!
#4 is what I’ve just learned this year! Life does come in full circle. Choose your passion and your passion will end up choosing you too <3